Articles, Blog

You Suck at Photoshop – Covering Your Mistakes

September 3, 2019


DONNIE: Hi. My name is Donnie, and “You
Suck at Photoshop.” Let’s waste another five or six
minutes of my life, and see if we can do something about it. What we’re going to do today
is, we’re going to reel it back from the last tutorial. It was a little tricky,
I think. We’re just going to do some old
school Photoshop stuff. We’re going to remove a
foreground object off of its background, and replace the
background, make it look like it disappeared. And then we’ll throw
a lens flare on it. It’s going be one of those
awesome old Photoshop tricks. So let’s start by opening
up bridge. You need to get a photo that
you think you can pull the background off, so maybe some
consistent, like a texture that you can recreate. Maybe you’ve got a picture of a
friend or somebody that you want to trick up a little bit,
you want to have a goof on– or maybe you’ve got a picture
of the cat your wife rescued without talking to you first,
and brought it home, and made your house a cat toilet. And then when her emergency
business meeting came up this weekend, she refused to let you
take it to a kennel, and that you’d have to watch
the cat this weekend. Do you have that photo? I do. So let’s open that up. So here’s our photo. And basically, what I want to
do is get rid of the cat. The first thing I’m going to
do is organize some layers. Let’s start a new layer group
called new carpet, because what we’re going to do is– I know what you did. Hey, I saw it. You went over to the clone
stamp tool, didn’t you? Wrong. Put it down. We’re going to go do it. That’s Bush league, and we’re
going to do it this way. We’re going to just go grab some
carpet samples, and we’re going to drop them in,
and we’re going to rebuild the carpet. Everything’s going
to be all right. Just settle down. All right. So we’ve got a layer called
new carpet, a layer group called new carpet. Let’s copy the background, so
we come back and see what we did later on. And then we’re going to start
grabbing some carpet samples. Now you’re going to grab the
marquee tool, and you’re going to start selecting– hold on a sec. What? MALE SPEAKER: Hey, bitch shits–
are you going to log on and do this raid
with us or not? DONNIE: Hey, listen. I told you that I
had to do this– MALE SPEAKER: No,
hold on a sec. I need a rez. DONNIE: I can’t– MALE SPEAKER: Nobody
can give me a rez? DONNIE: I can’t go
out there right– FEMALE SPEAKER: Donnie. DONNIE: Hold on. MALE SPEAKER: She’s going
out, isn’t she? DONNIE: I can’t– FEMALE SPEAKER: Donnie. DONNIE: Hold on. MALE SPEAKER: Is she wearing
those leather chaps, those assless chaps? Oh, dude, that is not a business
meeting– not. DONNIE: I’ll call you back
in a little bit. Cockgobbler. MALE SPEAKER: I’m still on. Assless chaps is not
a business meeting. DONNIE: All right. I’ve got to go for a few hours,
so finish covering up the cat with carpet, and
I’ll be right back. OK. I’m back. I guess if you took the time to
cover up the cat with the carpet, it probably looks
something like this, or probably not as good. You’ve probably got a lot of
problems, and if you do have a lot of problems, than what we
need to do is figure out a way we can cover up those
mistakes. So let’s do that now. We’ll create a new layer,
and make a stain. In our house, that’s not
going to be a problem. I mean, these things are
all over the place. So just sort of create kind
of a stain shape. And let’s pick– maybe your cat actually
pees shit, which is what our cat does. It’s kind of weird. So let’s get, like,
a pee-poo color. And fill that in there. And we want to just take this
layer, and we’re going to select all. We’re going to do a little
Gaussian blur on it, just to soften up the edges, just a
few pixels, not too much, because it had time to really
bleed out on the carpet, and kind of make its mark there. Now for this layer, let’s set it
to multiply, and we’ve got a good stand now. We need to pull the opacity
way down, and make it look like it’s been there
for awhile. Yeah, now it’s starting to
look like my carpet. Let’s grab our eraser tool
again, get a nice sized brush, and we want to just start
clicking and modeling it a little bit, because no stain is
super geometric like that. So we’re just going to kind of
take away some of the edges, and maybe some of the pee-poo
was just a little thicker in places, because Bridget Jones,
the cat, just happened to have, like, some canned
food that night. That looks like a good stain. That kind of covers up our
trouble, and you can move it around wherever it might
serve you best. So that’s looking pretty good. Now all we have– fuck. Give me five more
minutes, please. Stop, stop. MALE SPEAKER: Grow a sac. Grow a sac. DONNIE: So what do
you have now? The cat is still here now. If you want to, you can use
the cat somewhere else. You could take the cat. I think maybe you, like– maybe we could put the cat,
like, up in the bag, just whatever strikes your fancy. If you’re using– drop your tool down, and just
kind of rough these edges out of here, just the cat kind
of smashed in the bag. And the cat never really did
anything to me– just came in at a bad time. And so I’m not saying that I’ve
got anything against the cat, exactly, but that maybe it
just came into my life when I needed some attention. And I needed to be able to walk around, and mark my territory.

100 Comments

  • Reply drakkan88 October 20, 2012 at 5:16 pm

    It's an entire series. It's a show + tutorial.

  • Reply dustyb58 November 2, 2012 at 2:37 am

    And thus, Sna-fortch was born.

  • Reply sbacci488 November 4, 2012 at 6:23 pm

    XD

  • Reply Jax November 5, 2012 at 11:11 pm

    douche.png?

  • Reply Minister of the Church of Bob Saget November 11, 2012 at 9:10 pm

    BUSINESS MEEEETING!

  • Reply Amplifier Studios November 19, 2012 at 2:40 pm

    love his family..disturbing him and the skype guy 😛

  • Reply TheDarkBlob November 28, 2012 at 4:40 pm

    You're so awesome 😀 only thing you could do better is removing the echo in your mic

  • Reply The Cake December 4, 2012 at 11:36 pm

    your great

  • Reply mister6941 December 5, 2012 at 1:49 am

    Towards the end he sounded like he needed to take a shit

  • Reply grosslyclever December 20, 2012 at 4:42 am

    You have some serious emotional p Robles. I suggest you see a psychiatrist 6 times a week to work out your emotional problems. You may want to bring your soon to be ex wife as well because your marriage is going to shit. I sincerely hope this shed a little light on your horrible life. On a lighter note, you are a very good video tutorial maker. Keep em coming.

  • Reply grosslyclever December 27, 2012 at 1:01 am

    Not troll just a joke, sir

  • Reply Yanique Tucker January 2, 2013 at 7:18 am

    Almost cried toward the end ;( emotional video..

  • Reply Nathan Weir January 8, 2013 at 3:41 am

    hahahahahahaha those filenames and folder names hahahha!!!

  • Reply Average Bear January 9, 2013 at 10:08 pm

    It's funny how everyone said he sounded like Dane Cook, so he put him in his Douchebag folder.

  • Reply v January 11, 2013 at 11:10 pm

    man i actually start feeling really bad for this guy near the end… 🙁

  • Reply Truth Finder January 15, 2013 at 4:44 pm

    Too much of that interruption stuff is detracting and takes away from the video.

  • Reply Christian Vitale January 19, 2013 at 12:44 pm

    Are there actually people that don't realize that these aren't meant to be serious tutorials?

  • Reply TheNamesWaffaffle January 26, 2013 at 7:17 am

    5:11 + he sounds so stressed

  • Reply edymasta February 8, 2013 at 3:27 am

    Ppl actually think his was real lol

  • Reply blackshuck1000 February 16, 2013 at 11:54 am

    Mr Cook, this is a metric fuckton better than your stage shit.

  • Reply Michael and Ron February 22, 2013 at 6:21 am

    if your cat pees shit

  • Reply Jada Goggins February 28, 2013 at 5:02 am

    WTF did I just watch…. O.O

  • Reply Kalyn Griffin March 2, 2013 at 8:39 pm

    Your videos are so funny. But tone down the hard breathing. All i can hear is your loud breathing the whole time. Or dont, doesnt matter.. still funny

  • Reply Aisha Morgan March 12, 2013 at 4:47 pm

    His heavy breathing is to indicate how much distress he is under. Also, to show how much he hates his life.

  • Reply Kalyn Griffin March 16, 2013 at 3:06 pm

    @Aisha Morgan i know. thats not what i meant. but they way he did it was just pretty load in the mic.

  • Reply bingey April 3, 2013 at 11:45 pm

    At 0:38 is that folder named pussies? o.o

  • Reply Michael Brians April 6, 2013 at 3:38 am

    You must don't read the dates? This video is old as shit bro.

  • Reply Corporate Filth April 16, 2013 at 7:08 am

    When i used to watch this i was so certain that was dane cook's voice. lol. I know its not
    but i was so convinced.

  • Reply drsupremo88 May 3, 2013 at 3:57 pm

    hahahaha fukn jokes

  • Reply Kilroi Jenkins May 6, 2013 at 7:31 pm

    lol @ piss factory

  • Reply UzikIdeo May 31, 2013 at 5:36 am

    Have you heard about Mimmu Fat Blast? (check it out on google) It is a quick way for you to melt fat fast.

  • Reply Anaphylaxis June 4, 2013 at 2:23 pm

    You realise that's the point?
    It's a PARODY

  • Reply Gordon Freeman July 15, 2013 at 8:53 pm

    it pees poo! lol wow

  • Reply Aaron Engstrom July 16, 2013 at 3:23 am

    It's like God, but with sociopathic tendencies.

  • Reply Danker Pines July 19, 2013 at 8:04 am

    wait….but this is how i actually use photoshop…am…am I joke…i can't…i…i have to leave. I'm sorry, i have to leave

  • Reply TheKrigeron July 31, 2013 at 4:42 pm

    "Bridget Jones the cat" you're killing me

  • Reply bai September 13, 2013 at 10:40 am

    THAT DAMN SKYPE CALL!!

  • Reply snowglobe September 22, 2013 at 3:58 am

    Sounds like actor Paul rudd in this video. Wonder if it was?

  • Reply Th4w September 22, 2013 at 3:55 pm

    They're actually extremely useful.

  • Reply Justin Barylski October 29, 2013 at 9:40 pm

    Are these real

  • Reply GrandmasterBBC October 30, 2013 at 5:39 am

    How in the hell have I spent so many years on YouTube and only now just landed here? Brilliant.

  • Reply Candice Poe January 4, 2014 at 8:26 pm

    Ive learned so much more than  watching any other tutorial. 

  • Reply Seth Eheart January 20, 2014 at 6:33 pm

    THAT IS NOT A BUSINESS MEETING!! 

  • Reply Kieron Young January 22, 2014 at 12:21 am

    hahahaaaa… Lol the pictures names

    Douche
    Piss_Factory
    Haircut

  • Reply TheBIGJake111 March 11, 2014 at 11:41 pm

    that is not a buisness meeting!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

  • Reply The Haunted Farm April 1, 2014 at 6:02 am

    One day I will get a pet cat and name her Piss Factory.

  • Reply Jay G April 9, 2014 at 12:08 am

    I love these!

  • Reply Mynames madeup April 22, 2014 at 2:22 pm

    Reminds me of Rick (Justin Roiland) minus the hoarse voice and excessive burping on Rick and Morty.

  • Reply Y oobz May 4, 2014 at 11:16 am

    Reminds me of Tom Green haha

  • Reply joshuaoha May 7, 2014 at 3:35 pm

    :'-( I suck at photoshop. God I suck at photoshop.

  • Reply ChiptheBlackMage May 8, 2014 at 2:28 pm

    He could always decline the WoW guy's Skype calls…

  • Reply Tim K July 16, 2014 at 9:44 pm

    Dane Cook……Fuck that guy.

  • Reply Sovereign State August 2, 2014 at 12:06 pm

    I need a res! hahahahaha

  • Reply Terminal CPL August 6, 2014 at 10:45 pm

    F Busch league! This is way too good!

  • Reply Tish Smiddy August 8, 2014 at 5:53 pm

    Lol Lol
    I watch,and I DO learn a lot
    Believe it or not

    Lol

  • Reply Hayleyessa August 17, 2014 at 7:52 pm

    LMAO!!!! 

  • Reply Rizki Muhammad August 28, 2014 at 2:22 am

    I really can't tell if this guy is joking or serious

  • Reply catbot October 8, 2014 at 8:03 am

    the beginning was fucking hysterical

  • Reply John Kothanek November 14, 2014 at 1:31 am

    Dude your talents are wasted you are effing hilarious So well done thanks. Truly unique comedy mind. piss factory hahahaha

  • Reply RegisteredCinephile January 30, 2015 at 12:41 am

    "So, uh, that's looking pretty good. Now all weFUUUCK."

  • Reply Trab February 13, 2015 at 10:56 am

    GROW A SACK hahahaha.

  • Reply noob5000000 February 14, 2015 at 9:57 am

    piss_factory

  • Reply lifelieswaiting February 26, 2015 at 4:26 am

    I'm taking Photoshop this semester. We're required to submit some tutorial resources we've discovered to the online discussion group. I want to submit this. But not under my own name. I'm just waiting for someone to forget to log out of Blackboard.

  • Reply Manikinator March 31, 2015 at 4:18 pm

    Piss_factory.jpg hahaha

  • Reply Nana Wilson June 12, 2015 at 10:33 pm

    aww man, I remember this one…. wow, so great to see it again.  Favorite number 2.  LOVE this stuff.  Marry me!

  • Reply Bandicootfan63 August 5, 2015 at 4:27 pm

    I love this man. EDUCATIONAL COMEDY FTW

  • Reply InKa4484 September 21, 2015 at 6:03 am

    I swear this is David Cross talking through Dane Cook's voice.

  • Reply Brandon Poirier-Blair December 13, 2015 at 8:39 am

    he sounds like hes about to go into cardiac arrest

  • Reply Ashley McVay December 18, 2015 at 1:50 am

    Lmfao, lost my shit after the cat ended up inside the garbage bag hahaha

  • Reply Danny Daniel April 26, 2016 at 10:40 pm

    these video's are classic.

  • Reply Desmond Walker July 2, 2016 at 12:08 pm

    This is the funny photoshop video. Love it.

  • Reply Chris HP Le July 4, 2016 at 10:19 pm

    This might be the greatest thing I've ever seen.

  • Reply CubeWorks July 5, 2016 at 11:55 am

    Do I need a cat to do this?

  • Reply Poirot's Mustache August 9, 2016 at 6:06 am

    This is absolute genius! How have I not heard about this by now???

  • Reply maliboo September 4, 2016 at 1:17 am

    Will these tutorials still apply to the newer versions?

  • Reply narmaK September 15, 2016 at 3:21 pm

    "are you gonna do this raid with us or not" lmaoooo

  • Reply Saff Michael September 26, 2016 at 2:58 am

    Had no idea David Cross and Jay of "Jay and Silent Bob" were buddies.

  • Reply Jawbreakers March 6, 2017 at 9:59 pm

    Haha funny channel

  • Reply Jawbreakers March 6, 2017 at 10:02 pm

    No offense but it's very loud

  • Reply Rotten Egg Creations May 20, 2017 at 4:57 am

    Let this live here forever.

  • Reply Craig June 18, 2017 at 10:55 pm

    years later, still some of my favourite stuff on you-tube

  • Reply Dallas Fark July 16, 2017 at 11:53 pm

    This is the best set of tutorials PERIOD, on the 'Tubes

  • Reply Reds July 26, 2017 at 2:25 pm

    >clone stamp tool

    People use that? i always used lasso o.o

  • Reply Sydney Van October 29, 2017 at 2:38 am

    bro fuck wix with that long ass commercial

  • Reply Richard Rico December 15, 2017 at 10:13 pm

    Only finding these 9-10 years later. Lol at dane cook sounding guy using dane cook photos. 2008…those were Cook prime years

  • Reply jose duran January 5, 2018 at 6:30 am

    Nice video, and cats are fucking amazing!!!

  • Reply SolidStake March 21, 2018 at 2:06 pm

    I lost it when he put the cat in the trash bag. 😂

  • Reply Koala Nectar April 27, 2018 at 6:25 pm

    This video made me laugh so insanely hard… Get. Rid. Of. The Cat.

  • Reply blah June 12, 2018 at 3:25 am

    HEY DANE WHERE YOU BEEN.

  • Reply Masterr59 November 29, 2018 at 8:22 pm

    I nicknamed my cat The Crystal Pisser because she, too, likes to piss wherever she wants.

  • Reply henry December 15, 2018 at 12:00 am

    "piss_factory.jpg" kills me every time

  • Reply J R December 28, 2018 at 11:50 pm

    thanks, this was helpful

  • Reply The Wade Effect February 13, 2019 at 3:40 pm

    2019

  • Reply Andrew B. March 6, 2019 at 9:46 am

    Bloody funny.

  • Reply marlys mcgregor April 28, 2019 at 6:54 pm

    "Do you have that photo? I. do." Awesome.

  • Reply attrzz May 22, 2019 at 2:54 am

    2019 and I'm discovering this NOW?!?!

  • Reply Valkyrie June 21, 2019 at 7:30 am

    These are so good!

  • Reply Shreyas N June 29, 2019 at 5:39 pm

    Brilliant.

  • Reply Xiwen Yeoh August 22, 2019 at 2:14 am

    Vennage article brought me here, after 11 years. Hahaha.

  • Reply Isaiah King August 29, 2019 at 5:22 am

    I found these when I was 15 and it taught me how to use PS. Now I’m a graphic designer. Thanks, Donnie

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